Here We Go, Here We Go, Here We Go!

So, after all the hype and expectation, England are out of the World Cup at the hands of Germany. No change there then.

All through the tournament England played like they were asleep and Germany played like they wanted to win. On reflection, I'm not surprised. What is surprising is why expectation is so high when it’s a lifetime since England were even thought likely to win. Also, why is it that players who perform perfectly well for their club consistently disappoint for their country? Pressure? Not likely, these guys are under a lot of pressure on a weekly basis in the Premier League. Another reason given is tiredness. I wonder how that sounds to fans who on average work a 12-hour day for a tiny fraction of what footballers get. Premier League footballers are fed the best nutrition money can buy and are (or should be) at the peak of physical fitness. They play no more matches a season than any other European team, so no excuse there either.

Why does the team fail to reproduce the football we see week in week out during the season? The reaction of some of the players to their poor performance may give a clue. Rob Green’s lack of remorse at his mistake, Gerrard’s calm acceptance of the lack of attacking play and Rooney’s petulance after the Algerian game is significant. The will just wasn’t there.

Nowadays footballers are nurtured and encouraged (some would say indulged) all their lives and their sense of entitlement is enormous. They have no concept of the reality of the lives of the majority of their fans and cannot conceive of real disappointment. They get paid whether they perform well or not (and even if the club goes bust) and the concept of personal or national pride is probably far too abstract for them to understand. So, they shrug their shoulders and go on holiday to the derision of the press and the whole round of inquests into the state of the game in England begins yet again.

The TV coverage hasn’t helped football’s cause. It’ll be interesting to see how many TV viewers in England continue to watch the tournament now that England are out. ITV will have to try to wedge even more ads into their coverage which has been poor to say the least. The standard of commentary, the pundits chosen to comment during the few moments that ads aren’t being shown and the general professionalism has been bad. I get the feeling Adrian Chiles will be regretting his decision to leave the BBC before too long. The breakdown of HD during the England v Slovenia match just at the time when England scored was appalling. I have to admit the thought crossed my mind whether someone had bet on that happening.
The last time the game was honest?

It has struck me watching the poor standard of refereeing during the tournament that gambling has had a huge impact on football for quite a while. I think it’s significant that a BBC documentary into this aspect of English football was abandoned some years ago. This documentary led into another on the finances of the game which resulted in Alex Ferguson refusing to speak to the BBC directly (a practice which he continues to this day). I’m sure there is some enterprising journalist out there with the resources and contacts to look into this with I would imagine some striking results, but I do think that the state of English football has needed close examination for some time. When you think how much money is poured into the game nowadays, I’d be surprised to find there’s nothing untoward going on. As my old dad used to say, where there’s cash there’s crooks. But how does this affect the national team? Without any values the game will always be subject to cheating and where you can cheat in a game, there’s not much honour in winning. So a young football player who’s seen backhanders, bungs, gambling syndicates etc is not going to be burning with passion to play for his country. You might say that this must happen everywhere, and so it might but it’s England we’re talking about here. The game invented here and played throughout the centuries in one form or another has been sold off to the best bidder.

Where do we go from here? There may be people inside football who are trying to improve things but you need to put things into context. With other young men facing injury and death in Afghanistan for no good reason (and doing so for a pittance) it might just dawn on the punters that watching a bunch of millionaires stroking a ball round a field is not really worth the money or the effort. We’ll see.

The End of The World Cup As We Know It

The End of the World Cup As We Know It

The hype leading up to the World Cup has been incredible and I pity anyone who has no interest in football; we’ve been drenched in ads for products and programmes all year. That said,I've been looking forward to a festival of the beautiful game for some time.

It follows then that after all this expectation the event itself has proved to be most disappointing so far. The so-called “big” teams have been lacklustre and according to the statisticians this has been the lowest scoring world cup ever.

So, what’s the deal? Part of the problem is the noise. The vuvuzela has drowned out any atmosphere. To most football fans and players, singing, drum banging and chanting are an integral part of the game and without these, the games feel sterile. Now I know it’s not done to criticise other cultures, but the vuvuzela is a fairly new phenomenon and has been latched onto by big business. I am really glad the World Cup has finally come to Africa, but the cacophony produced by these plastic horns has been distracting (according to some players) and irritating (from a TV spectator’s point of view). You could also say it’s drowning out any support a team would expect from its supporters.

The quality of the TV presentation is poor, a lot of the pundits are not fluent English speakers (Adebayor is unintelligible) and the puerile ITV post-match show featuring James Corden is appalling. ITV have obviously tried to catch the atmosphere generated by Sky’s Soccer AM with no success whatsoever. In the middle of a recession, I find it somewhat offensive to watch overpaid and in the main under-educated presenters and pundits enjoying a 5-week holiday paid (in the BBC’s case at least) by the license fee payer.
Since it’s pretty much obligatory to criticise FIFA, can I just say that half empty stadia has confirmed the worst theories about that organisation. For a non-profit organisation (who made £1.5 billion last year), FIFA has shown themselves to be greedy in the extreme. It just confirms that FIFA are all about the money and the poorer South Africans have been totally ignored. If I were organising an event like this, I would rather sell more cheap tickets than fewer expensive ones. The fact that FIFA are currently busying themselves suing half the small businesses in Cape Town and Johannesburg for selling flags and other World Cup paraphernalia says it all.

Why do I think the above means the end of football as we know and love it? The sheer greed of those involved (the fact that a ticket costs the equivalent of a week's wage in South Africa means that grass roots fans who support football year round cannot attend), the complete ignorance of the TV presenters about Africa and their lack of concern about the people for whom football is the only sport they can afford to play, is distasteful to say the least. I wonder how much, if any, of the money generated by the World Cup will actually find its way into the pockets of the ordinary South African? Very little, I would imagine.

Which leads to the obvious conclusion, football (or soccer as many are calling it, with an eye to the USA television franchise) is dying on its feet. This World Cup may be it’s death knell and although a life-long fan, I for one wouldn’t weep. The game has turned into one played by millionaires for the entertainment of the working poor.
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So is it really the end for football? For me, maybe. I’m getting a little tired of the stark contrast between the haves and have nots, not to mention the snide, patronising remarks made by the chattering classes on the obvious flaws in the game. When I was a child, the World Cup was a chance to see loads of football in foreign places and all your heroes playing at their very peak for the honour of winning. Now, you wonder if they’d do it without the huge financial incentives and advertising revenue it brings. Cynical? Perhaps, but maybe having the World Cup in Africa has shown us just what the game has come to.
Labels: Sport

One True Love....

Steely Dan and I go back a long way. From the days when I pestered my older brothers to bring me to gigs, crashed their parties and stole their albums, the Dan's music has been an essential background to some of my highs and lows.

From the earliest time, Steely Dan have had a rather fractious reputation amongst the musical fraternity. Famous for their high standards (they famously sacked Mark Knopfler) they would worry their way through each album. None of that angst is apparent on the immaculate songs they’ve crafted and although there are many favourites of mine, Don't Take Me Alive, Only a Fool Would Say That, My Old School; Pretzel Logic; Dr Wu (to name but a few) I can’t with all honesty say there’s a weak track on any album.

My first “legit” album was Gaucho, given to me by a two-timing son of a bitch for whom I was a last fling before he got married (hope she fleeced you in what must only have been the inevitable divorce), and was the only good thing to come out of that mistake. Thereafter, the first question on meeting a prospective lover was “do you like Steely Dan?”. Ignorance could be forgiven and soon corrected, but a “not really” saw the fool kicked out the door, I can tell you. It’s not a bad tester ladies, I never met a man who liked the Dan who wasn’t one of the good guys.

The 20 year hiatus between Aja and Two Against Nature marked a busy solo career for Donald Fagen and Walter Becker, with Fagen being the more productive. Now we were back to typical Steely Dan, punchy tunes, witty lyrics and production values from heaven (or hell if you’re into punk) Shame About Me and Jack of Speed and being the punchiest and wittiest.

They've done a couple more and re-visited some of their old stuff and I could go through every album and note each one but the above is a good flavour of what to expect.

As for the Dan being the soundtrack to my life, at a time when I had lost someone very dear to me and thought that life was over, I listened to Any Major Dude and there was Don, comforting me and telling me everything was okay in his usual laid back way.

In recent years, Steely Dan have finally received the recognition they deserve with a Grammy and Rock & Roll Hall of Fame Awards (by which they were suitably unimpressed, cool dudes that they are). .

They are particularly well represented by a tribute band called Nearly Dan (a great bunch of people and a very tight band) who have the distinction of being permitted to release their live set on CD and DVD. Do check them out if you can.

No, These are the Best Songs Ever

The gauntlet having been flung unceremoniously in my face by Gregling, I started this list thinking, "where do I begin?". Well, at the beginning, fool. So in no particular order other than these have meant a lot to me all through my life, here we go. Of course, I shall be adding to this list as times goes by (wait a minute...) so stay tuned...

The Man That Got Away - Judy Garland



I must have been about 7 when I first saw A Star is Born. Judy's voice is wonderful in this live version of the heart wrenching torch song. For all who've loved and lost (who hasn't?).

I Want You Back - Jackson 5

Just before guitar music took me, Motown was my thang. Now in middle age the old pull has returned and Soul Music (or R&B as you young folk like to call it) has me in its grip again.

Swing by My Way - Will I AM and John Legend

Great R&B Tune

Then came Rory - and the rest as they say.....



David Bowie - Rock N Roll Suicide

Yes, I know but I have it on vinyl from a market in London with my name written on it! My brother bought it in Dublin, sold it for some weed, and picked it up again with my name in schoolgirl writing in the street lamp. Only we know it's true so the album is precious. The song is too for the campness and hysteria. FAB!

Immigrant Song - Led Zeppelin

Bobby is and will always be my love. Oh and Jimmy wasn't bad either.

James Taylor - Carolina on my Mind

When Bobby was otherwise engaged, there was always James. Hard to imagine now, but a beautiful chiseled face with a river of dark shining hair. Sensitive and sexy, irristible!

Benny Goodman - Sing Sing Sing



Bit of a style change, but no less exciting. The big band sound as epitimised by a master. Try not moving! My dad had a whole collection of this sort of thing and I knew it off by heart. Never could jive though.

Fleetwood Mac Oh Well



Peter Green at his best, a great riff.

Joni Mitchell - All I Want

Grew up with Joni's songs, she always sounded so grown up. Still does.

Steely Dan - King of The World

One of their least known and greatest songs about a post-atomic world. "any man left on the Rio Grande is the king of the world as far as I know". This would make a fantastic movie. As always with the Dan, the lyrics are as good as the music. Those guys work hard at every song, and it shows.

Van Morrison - Into the Mystic

I first heard this in Ireland and desperately wanted to see him but never got to go. Story of my life, him, Zepp all of them. Probably why I love live music now, making up for lost time.

Oh Lori - The Alessi Brothers

Kenny Everett loved this and so do I. Kenny played songs he loved over and over again. i used to listen to his shows on Capital Radio in 1976/7. He was wonderfully obsessive and this piece of bubblegum is just soooo sweet!



Still on the cheddar..

The Starland Vocal Band - Afternoon Delight

Sorry, I know,but I loved this in 1976, that lovely hot summer. Oh and while I'm here....

England Dan and John Ford Coley - I'd Really Love to See you Tonight

Another one from 76. Ahhh

Joni Mitchell - In France They Kiss on Main Street

Yet another from 76, well that's when I first heard it. It will always remind me of long summer days and trying to get cool in the sea after dark.

The Police - King of Pain

I loved these guys from day 1. I wanted one of those flying suits. This is typical Sting,self indulgent,narcissistic and catchy with it.

ABC - Poison Arrow

Great Intro, fab tune, I loved Martin Fry.

It Bites - Kiss Like Judas

An 80's band would you believe? A bit before and after their time, they'd go down a storm now, strong guitars, long songs and lovely pretty boys. Francis Dunnery is in my humble opinion a guitar hero. Wonder what he's doing now? This video is typical 80s, tacky overblown lavish. Just listen to the riff!


Tears For Fears - Mellow

Mellow indeed, this is a band who could always write a good song and this one is a prime example. Just your good quality pop song.

Genesis - Cinema Show

When I'm down, I listen to the Seconds Out version of this. Who said prog was just for boys?

Yes - Siberian Khatru

Absolute hogwash, but great music in there. Your real prog, with Rick and the boys going for it on the Close to the Edge album.

Stone Roses - Tears

Story of my life, by the time I found these guys, they'd split up. Jeez! For an old rocker like me The Second Coming was indeed a revelation.

Radiohead - Just

"You do it to yourself" yep got it. Thom has always found the nerve hasn't he? Just the best band to come out in the last 20 years. Right on.

Devon Sproule - Old Virginia Block



Discovered via Jools Holland, this lovely girl is straight out of a Woody Guthrie song. Sweet voice and a touch of the "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?".

What a Difference

Well better late than never….

I hear that BBC is going to start showing The Wire soon. It’s seven years since the first one but like any classic it doesn't date and I only started watching a couple of months ago. It’ll be interesting to see if they leave the swearing in. The violence is sparse but as I said before, shocking.

The recent showing of Red Riding on Channel 4 brought into sharp relief for me the difference in quality of TV writing between here and the USA. I stuck with all six hours of that badly written over-stylised piece of crap in the hope that something would happen, it would all come together and everything would be explained. Now I don’t think I’m particularly thick, but the one rule about a whodunit is that you should care who in fact done it. The other rule about drama writing is that if you do leave gaps in the dialogue, you should at least show some visual information. Nothing of the kind was offered here. You felt from the start that you’d come in half way.

You didn’t care about any of the characters (unlike The Wire where everyone was interesting and you wanted to know more). These people were one-dimensional, nasty pieces of work. What a dark view this man has of the world! I regard myself as somewhat of a cynic, but this guy needs therapy.

The dénouement of Red Riding was embarrassingly bad. It was a shame to see the best young actors in the country reduced to appearing in what turned out to be someone’s attempt at A-level fiction. We were informed before every show that the series was based on “the best-selling cult novels” and I wonder just how the author must have felt to see his work reduced to such gimmicky MTV (without the music) trash. TV shows are made by 20 year-olds for middle-aged folk and the sooner they realise that our attention span is somewhat longer than a gnat, the better.

Synchronicity

Not just the name of a very fine Police album, this actually happens to me now and again. Years ago (I’m talking 1980 or thereabouts) it was all things Japanese. I’d just been given Shogun by James Clavell to read by a friend, which is a rollicking good adventure and suddenly everything was Japan, fashion (pale skin, red lips blue-black hair) music and a huge exhibition of samurai artefacts at the British Museum. Then the TV series with of all people Richard Chamberlain who was not how I’d imagined the hero. Never mind. But it does give a good indication of what I mean. This kind of synchronicity seems only to happen to me where the arts are concerned, by which I mean books, TV, music, and in some cases a particular historical moment (my Ancient Greek phase has passed into legend).

At the moment, it’s music. Imagine gentle reader, I’m sitting in my humble living room watching The Wire and thinking, “gosh, this music’s good”, whereupon I surf the web, find a CD compilation of music from said TV series and purchase same. Fast forward a week (exciting, isn’t it?) and I receive the disk, download it onto the iPod and there on the second track is what I can only describe as the VOICE OF GOD.



You heard me. I’m trudging to the bus stop at 8am and then this VOICE comes on and I nearly fall over. Now, I am not given to that kind of behaviour in public (dignity, always dignity) but this man’s voice is so powerful, beautiful and in every sense moving that I have to find out more. His name is Michael Franti, he’s been on the scene (as far as I can tell) for over ten years, making music that speaks to social justice, and love.

This man is fab! Of course, my initial reaction is “he’s gone, no one that radical is allowed to exist in this world for long” but no, he’s still there, he performs at one of Obama’s inauguration balls, and even better, HE’S COMING HERE!!!! (Manchester Academy in July). Oh My God (the name of the track that caught me and one I would thoroughly recommend for a nano-lesson in recent American history).

Synchronicity, see?

Mutton Dressed as Lamb?

Why are women of a certain age dressing like trailer trash teenagers? It’s quite shocking sometimes, you see an extremely overweight middle-aged woman waddling down the street with a skimpy top and cut off trousers (which only models size zero should wear anyway). Do they not possess full-length mirrors? I know it’s not easy to get smart stylish clothes for any age now, there seems to be a surfeit of cheap fabrics, soiled looking jeans and bad haircuts around, but what people forget is you have to be a) stick thin and b) incredibly beautiful to get away with it. To see women who I am sure are quite aware of how horrific they look in clothes that no one over the age of 16 should wear is sad. Even normally sensible women (see Janet Street-Porter pictured) have made horrendous mistakes.

One reason is that since the doyen of shops for the middle aged woman – M&S – decided to wring as much money out of us as possible by dividing their shops into “designer” units, it’s become harder to find decent clothes. Now I am definitely not the twin set and pearls type, I want to look good as anyone does, but really!

Then there are the “style consultants” like Trinny and Suzanne, who I’m sure have a good laugh in the privacy of their mansions laughing at how gullible and desperate women can be. Yet another horror is that “10 years younger” programme, which takes very plain ladies and tarts them up to look like newly retired whores. On top of that, there is the humiliating format which calls for people to insult a woman in the street. Can you imagine any man allowing himself to be treated like this?

I think the whole issue may be because of the fact that the people responsible for fashion and media really hate women. If you factor in that thought, you can see why those TV programmes exist and why nothing flattering is designed for women who have gone beyond puberty or who have any breasts, never mind may be older that 16.

Of course the really cruel side of this is that it is we middle-aged women who suffer most from this type of fashion. Because it is harder to stay slim in your 40s and 50s, the fashion as it is today looks even more grotesque on anyone overweight (which, let’s be frank, includes nearly all of us). There are obviously some very disturbed people in the fashion and media industries who have serious issues with their mother. But to take it out on the rest of us is unnecessarily cruel, don’t you think?

There has never been a time when women of a certain age could be regarded as attractive, until now. In the recent past (the 1970s springs to mind as a good example) to be 40+ and a woman was to cease to exist. There were no role models on TV any woman having the nerve to age being discreetly removed from in front of the camera. Nowadays there are one or two, but Madonna?? Deary me, that taught tense body, that mean tight face, I don't call that growing old gracefully.

But, be fair, she and her peers are pathfinders for a new way. They are the women who will make the mistakes for us. You never know, one day being and older woman will be something to look forward to, a golden time when a sense of style and comfort in one's skin are the rewards for a life well-lived.