If there are any (however small) positives about getting older, one of these has to be the absence of Romantic live in one’s life (“No!” I hear you shout, “don’t say that!”). Now I don’t mean that life becomes a meaningless grey void, far from it, but the opportunities for one’s heart being broken by “lurve” is minimised in direct response to the increasing years. A lot of people mourn this passing, I don’t. I do not miss the humiliation of rejection, the anger the loneliness, the sheer embarrassment of having to tell people why one is suddenly “alone” – so? What’s your bloody problem? We are born “alone” and yes, we die that way, must we all conform to the couple disease permeating our society? I speak as half of a couple of over 25 years here so don’t accuse me of sour grapes. I find it amazing in this age of iPods and Satellites that we still measure our worth as to whether we are coupled or not.
Someone very dear to me is in the midst of the break-up of a relationship. It’s very hard, watching him trying to cope with his grief and the sense of helplessness and anger I feel brings my own “halcyon” days back to me. Why should this be so? Why do we put ourselves through this? How many people do you know who have experienced “Hollywood love”? I can’t say I know many, most of the relationships I have come across (including my own) are a mixture of compromise and disappointment. The few (very short lived) moments of romantic ecstasy I have experienced have come at a very dear price indeed, in self-esteem and even respect.
Having said all that, the infinitesimal chance that happiness can be found is one of the reasons we are human and endure the “slings and arrows” of everyday life as we do, because we all know the highs are very high indeed. So on we go, searching for the Holy Male (or Female), making mistakes and getting our hearts broken over and over again.
Maybe listening to the above will help. Steely always know what to say.
I try to console him, trotting out the age-old clichés, and yet they’re clichés because they’re based in truth, time does heal, there are plenty more fish etc etc. I don’t know when he’ll feel better but I do know that he will, this experience will have changed him and so he will continue to grow and evolve, not becoming bitter and sour but gaining wisdom and strength and when he does meet “the one” he will know it and also recognise that he has earned this treasure and that will make it all the sweeter.
Someone very dear to me is in the midst of the break-up of a relationship. It’s very hard, watching him trying to cope with his grief and the sense of helplessness and anger I feel brings my own “halcyon” days back to me. Why should this be so? Why do we put ourselves through this? How many people do you know who have experienced “Hollywood love”? I can’t say I know many, most of the relationships I have come across (including my own) are a mixture of compromise and disappointment. The few (very short lived) moments of romantic ecstasy I have experienced have come at a very dear price indeed, in self-esteem and even respect.
Having said all that, the infinitesimal chance that happiness can be found is one of the reasons we are human and endure the “slings and arrows” of everyday life as we do, because we all know the highs are very high indeed. So on we go, searching for the Holy Male (or Female), making mistakes and getting our hearts broken over and over again.
Maybe listening to the above will help. Steely always know what to say.
I try to console him, trotting out the age-old clichés, and yet they’re clichés because they’re based in truth, time does heal, there are plenty more fish etc etc. I don’t know when he’ll feel better but I do know that he will, this experience will have changed him and so he will continue to grow and evolve, not becoming bitter and sour but gaining wisdom and strength and when he does meet “the one” he will know it and also recognise that he has earned this treasure and that will make it all the sweeter.
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